Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The More Things Change The More They Stay The Same

I've been doing some thinking. It is true that the economy isn't doing well, but that doesn't mean that things aren't going to get better. Although things could still get worse before then. I, however, hope that it gets better sooner rather than later. Like so many people out there I am currently unemployed, not for lack of trying. I mean, by my own count I have sent out over 60 resumes and or applications and of those gotten only 4 or 5 hits, in terms of call backs and interviews. I don't know. It is sad and depressing, but at the sometime maybe it is a good thing. Maybe the job I am really looking for is still out there and by some odd chance I am going to get it. Or maybe nothing will happen at all. All I know at this point is that discouragement and feeling down aren't the way to go. As hard as it is to put a happy spin or a smiling face on the situation, that is just what I have to do. I need to know that there will be something good around the corner. I guess in a way I've been putting myself and those around me in a rut. All I've done lately is talk about what I am doing, or trying to do and how I am getting nothing in return. In essence I bitch, moan, and complain and all those around me suffer. I want to foremost say that I am truly sorry. I don't want to disappoint anyone or let anyone down and I am sometimes afraid that is exactly what I am doing. There are some days, and they are such long days, that I just sit in my apartment and I can't do anything. I guess maybe that's the wrong idea. I should say I lose all interest. I spend most of my day at home cleaning up, and then I spend the rest of my time looking for jobs, but I have to be honest it sometimes doesn't take up my whole day and I just sit and do nothing sometimes. Even TV doesn't interest me. That is probably the low point. I'll be honest if it wasn't for the fact that we have a dog I probably would go crazy. Even with his company I sometimes just want to scream and cry. I hate it and I want it to end. That is why I know it is going to get better and I hope it is going to get better and I pray that it is going to get better and I just really want it to get better. So now the question, when is it finally going to get better? The answer: " ". Exactly no one ones, and no guess is justifiable, unless you're just the worlds best economist, which I am not.