Friday, September 30, 2005

A thought

Do not attempt to drown your sorrows.

For they can swim.

Do not attempt to hide your fears.

For they are known.

Do not attempt to be that which you are not.

For you are your own keeper.

Do not hesitate.

For unnecertanity is natural.

End at the beginning, Begin at the end

Thank You! I genuinely mean that. Thank you for everything.

I am writing this in AbiWord because at present blogger does not appear to be up. I will hopefully have it in blogger by the time you read this, because if you can read this while I am typing it in AbiWord then my security flaws are greater than even could've believed.

I am in a quasi mood of sadness, hate, joy and fear all at once. My WinAmp playlist is currently comprised of Gary Jules' version of "Mad World", Green Day's "Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)", Semisonic's "Closing Time" and the Eagle's "Desperado". So tell me would you agree with my assertion that I am currently not sure what feelings I am experiencing?

Each song has its own uniqueness to it. Each song speaks from a different point of view about a different subject, but they all share something. Each song is equally good, imho. Of course of the four Desperado is my favorite. Desperado is the song you let a suicidal person listen to right before they jump, pull the trigger, kick the bucket/chair, etc., and if they really mean it you'll know by how they react to the song. To be honest I don't really know what I am talking about, but I obviously wrote for one reason or another.

I would love to have a psychologist or psychiatrist or someone who understand the human mind better than I a simple lay person. It is amazing isn't it. We posses what we assume is one of the greatest mental abilities of any other creature on this planet and yet we know next to nothing about it really. What does that say about us really? Well for one we are not omnipotent as some would like to believe they are. Also we are not all geniuses, you know just because you know and or understand something doesn't make you smart. Intelligence comes from the application of dormant knowledge. That is to say, I for example know, oh, so many things, but it is only dormant knowledge. It means nothing in the grand scheme of things. If I can actively use and apply that knowledge towards a greater good, that would show true intelligence. Man can know and understand all "Godly" facts, but if man does not use that knowledge to the best of his ability he is no smarter than a programmed automaton who only recalls and delivers the information IT has been programmed to know and possibly understand.

Well by now the songs are on their second play through thanks to the repeat all button. Okay, now here is something I have been trying to figure out for a while. Why are so many people blinded wholly by their faith. It is true that I ask this as cynic in regards to understanding their point of view, but I just don't understand. How can any one person have faith in something that can not be proved definitively. And yes I also realize that gravity is not a definitive thing either, being a theory and all, but people do believe it exists. However, in that instance it is declared a THEORY, where as some people take their religion as undeniable fact. I mean, my God, why? Funny, huh? But, seriously why do people have such strong convictions in these things? I'll be honest sometimes I wish I had faith in something, so I could at least partially understand the devoutly religious. That unfortunately won't happen. I have, as some of you may know, lost all faith in my fellow man. Now, as a precursor, this only due to the fact that I can completely question existence and not get an answer and this is no ones fault. Perhaps humanity was never supposed to understand itself. Perhaps even trying to do so is folly. Maybe we should all continue to live our sheltered existence alone on this planet until a time comes when we can actively understand the truth of the situation.

Sometimes I wonder if I am on a drug that I am not aware of, I just went back and read what I wrote, but I get nothing from it. I find it to be pointless and with out cause. I don't know, maybe I am bi-polar or something. Maybe, I shouldn't question myself. Perhaps there is a reason for all this that just doesn't make sense right now.

At least one thing can always be certain for the time we have here, everyday starts new and ends new. The same thing never really happens again. Sure there are similarities, but nothing is ever the same. That is one thing we can always count on, not that this is necessarily a good thing or a bad thing, but we can count on it. Now to say that that is pure randomness or fate is not up to me. I am not controller or caretaker of the Universe or the earth for that matter. I can't even say for certain that any of this is real. That we aren't merely the creation of something or someone in a temporal plane of existence unknown to us. The world is an odd place. Yes, there are cycles and their repetition, but each cycle and repetition is imperfect or flawed when compared to its predecessor. This is the beauty of life. There is no pattern, but their is no randomness. Everything happens for a distinct reason and has a distinct cause, but nothing happens by fate and their are millions upon millions of probabilities for every action to prove that. As an example I submit to you this, when you wake up in the morning you are presented with choices, most of them unknown to you, but they are. You can proceed with your day, as though it were any other day, or you could go to sleep, or you could down the hall and beat the neighbor who plays the loud music, or you could jump out of a window, or you could do any one of a myriad of things. That is, absolutely nothing is set in stone. Ever. Even the stuff that is set in stone can be lost forever.

I don't know where I was going with this. I hope you don't mind the fact that I went on so long. I would like to take the time to thank my readers for reading this blog. I don't know who you are, but I would like it a lot if you said hi. Either with a comment, you can post anonymously, or with an instant message or even by e-mail. I am always here to listen to criticism, I only ask you keep it clean or I will have to delete it.

And now, because I did listen to them, here are the four songs:

Mad World - Gary Jules

All around me are familiar faces

Worn out places

Worn out faces

Bright and early for the daily races

Going no where

Going no where

Their tears are filling up their glasses

No expression

No expression

Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow

No tomorrow

No tomorrow

And I find it kind of funny

I find it kind of sad

The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had

I find it hard to tell you

I find it hard to take

When people run in circles its a very very

Mad world

Mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good

Happy birthday

Happy birthday

And I feel the way that every child should

Sit and listen

Sit and listen

Went to school and I was very nervous

No one knew me

No one knew me

Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson

Look right through me

Look right through me

And I find it kind of funny

I find it kind of sad

The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had

I find it hard to tell you

I find it hard to take

When people run in circles its a very very

Mad world

Mad world

Enlarging your world

Mad world

"Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)"

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road

Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go

So make the best of this test, and don't ask why

It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind

Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time

Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial

For what it's worth it was worth all the while

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

Closing time - time for you to go out, go out into the world.

Closing time - turn the lights up over every boy and every girl.

Closing time - one last call for alcohol, so finish your whiskey or beer.

Closing time - you don't have to go home but you can't stay here.

I know who I want to take me home.

I know who I want to take me home.

I know who I want to take me home.

Take me home...

Closing time - time for you to go back to the places you will be from.

Closing time - this room won't be open 'til your brothers or you sisters

come.

So gather up your jackets, and move it to the exits - I hope you have found

a

friend.

Closing time - every new beginning comes from some other beginning'send.

Yeah, I know who I want to take me home.

I know who I want to take me home.

I know who I want to take me home.

Take me home...

Closing time - time for you to go back to the places you will be from...

I know who I want to take me home.

I know who I want to take me home.

I know who I want to take me home.

Take me home...

Closing time - every new beginning comes from some other beginning'send...

"Desperado"

Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?

You been out ridin' fences for so long now

Oh, you're a hard one

I know that you got your reasons

These things that are pleasin' you

Can hurt you somehow

Don't you draw the queen of diamonds, boy

She'll beat you if she's able

You know the queen of hearts is always your best bet

Now it seems to me, some fine things

Have been laid upon your table

But you only want the ones that you can't get

Desperado, oh, you ain't gettin' no younger

Your pain and your hunger, they're drivin' you home

And freedom, oh freedom well, that's just some people talkin'

Your prison is walking through this world all alone

Don't your feet get cold in the winter time?

The sky won't snow and the sun won't shine

It's hard to tell the night time from the day

You're losin' all your highs and lows

Ain't it funny how the feeling goes away?

Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?

Come down from your fences, open the gate

It may be rainin', but there's a rainbow above you

You better let somebody love you, before it's too late

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Someone is pissing me off.....

Okay. It has been damn near a day since NCIS has come on and no one has posted a torrent for the second episode anywhere that I have looked from BiteNova to Torrentspy. I AM PISSED. I wanted to see that damn episode and now I still haven't seen it.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

oooopppsssyyy

Now, I forgot to update that post, but I have my reasons. The glowing box trapped me with Family Guy, American Dad, and Grey's Anatomy. So I didn't post anything else on Sunday, that and I also watched Adult Swim.
Yesterday also would not have worked because I felt like crap. I mean horrible. I have no idea what was going on, but I didn't like it one bit.
So I am finally posting again today. You happy? No? Too Bad...

Sunday, September 25, 2005

The West Wing

Okay now, great great opening. I hope this epsiode gets better.

Will update this post at episodes end.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Maruchan Instant Lunch Roast Chicken Flavor & Barq's Famous Olde Tyme Root Beer

MMM MMM GOOD!

This is what I am talking about. These are the food of the God's.

I should be there spokeperson. For both. I basically live off of the stuff. I mean that seriously.

MMM MMM GOOD!

http://www.maruchan.co.jp/
http://www.barqs.com/


By the way, I didn't take these pictures. They were all taken from a Google Image Search. Okay?

Damn It All To Hell

Though I should be happy, I am not. The serious stuff has passed over or that is never really came. I wanted my wind, my flooding, my total devastation and destruction, but NO! That just didn't happen.

WHY!!!!

Is it to much to ask for things to go wrong. Is it too much to ask for everything to not be just fine?

Why?

Why?

Why?

Why?

Why?

AAARRRGHHH!!!!!!!!

Power

Well, we have power back. Thank goodness.

At about 1 P.M. the power went off. It came on maybe 40 minutes ago.

Unfortunately the lights keep flickering. Not a good sign if you ask me.

I am not making any plans to have power all night, but you never know. It is supposed to rain all night long, but tomorrow, things should be better.

I must admit, I am glad we are not near the coast.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Classes Cancelled

Well, it would seem that the president of the University has cancelled classes tommorrow. I have absolutely no problem with this. Good Job.

Since I have no classes I plan on doing laundry and carrying on as though nothing has happened.
Because nothing has happened.

Anyway, I am watching the Season Premeir of CSI now. SO YAY!

Talk to you repeatedly tomorrow, and if the power stays on, Saturday and Sunday as well.

=The Management=

Holy Crap

Now, I don't mean to speak evil of the media, not that it really matters, but they really are trying to scare us to death.

Hurricane Rita is heading our way, though, I mean I am good deal inland, but it is still expected to be a Cat 1 when it gets to or near our area.

I don't know, perhaps I need to reconsider my earlier post about Global Warming?

Oh well, I don't expect anything bad to happen here, but further South, I can only hope people leave the affected areas.

edit 2:28 PM CST

Well looks like things may not be as bad as they seemed this morning, but the media is still over reacting to eveything. The media can sometimes be stupid and biased and this seems to be one of those times. However I won't say anything more.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Volume, man, Volume

I am talking about sound not the term for capacity.

If your speakers are turned off, you can't hear anything.

Make sure that your speakers are turned on so you can hear things.

Hearing things is good especially when something has sound.

So crank it up, to a moderate level, so as to not disturb your neighbors, roomates, or whatever the case may be.

This equation can be used to determine the intensity of sound in terms of I expressed in decibels

Basically if the I or I0 is bigger than 0 than you should get some sound. Or so I think.

A bel (symbol B) is a unit of measure of rations, such as power levels and voltage levels.

Monday, September 19, 2005

Serenity

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Study....Study....Study

Seriously now, I know I am by far not the spokesperson for studying and things like that, but you should do it.

Studying helps you remember things. Seriously.

I don't really know what I am trying to get at, but I am gonna go back to watching TV.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Global Warming

Now look, as much as I would like to say that I agree with the whole idea that Global Warming is one major factor for the slew of tropical storms and hurricanes we have been happening lately I just can't rule out other factors.

One of these factors being sheer randomness. Somethings, just happen. Sure I can agree that something is off. I mean we've had 15 named storms since the hurricane season started last month. (At least that is what I think). That seems a little off to me, or that is to say unusual.

Oh, and yes I am aware of a recent article by The Independent that pretty much says the Global Warming is past the point of no return.

However, I feel that though it does deserve some merit can't be entirely true. Also, I wish to note that I personally find that most of the damage we have done to the earth was from the beginning of the industrial revolution to around the end of World War II. I may not have any scientfic proof to back it up, but it is just my opinion after all. Further, we can fix this, or so I believe. It will just take a few things to make that happen. First all developed and developing countries would need to sign the Kyoto Protocols, specifically India and China, and subsequently the United States.

Then other matters would need to occur. We would need to completely stop the use of Fossil Fuels. Nuclear power would still be acceptable, due to its inexpensive nature, compared to fossil fuels. Of course with nuclear things a working form of disposal would need to occur. That is, we can't just dump it under a mountain. Now to make up for the fossil fuels other means of powering things would need to be created. Currently, I find that Hydrogen is the best bet, since it just loves to burn. For instance, this article about a new way to store hydrogen is one possible solution.

Of course the greatest solution, though it would never work, would be a perpetual motion generator and/or nuclear fission. Either of these two would allow for theoritcally near infinite and cheap power on scale that no one has yet been able to find. But now I am delving into areas of thought I know nothing if anything about.

Well there go my two cents again. Save them for who knows, one day they may be worthless.

Friday, September 16, 2005

/ != \ that is forward slash does not equal backslash

Okay,so I am setting up my windows variant torrentflux server, don't ask, and I make a big screw up. When pointing to a directory I put it in with backslashes when it required forward slashed. AARRGGHH!!!

Anyway, I am an idiot. And yes, this makes a HUGE difference. I mean catastrophic fauilre HUGE.

So, I fixed that and had myself a good laugh.

Also, what is up with these hurricanes. God must be in one bitchy mood, maybe it is that time of month. HMM?!? I dunno. Anyway. Off I go to do something else that is stupid. Or do I? HMM.....

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Folding@Home

Yet another shameless plug, but for a good cause.

For those not in the know, Folding@Home is a distributed computing project which studies protein folding, misfolding, aggregation, and related diseases. We use novel computational methods and large scale distributed computing, to simulate timescales thousands to millions of times longer than previously achieved. This has allowed us to simulate folding for the first time, and to now direct our approach to examine folding related disease. (I just pulled this from their site)

If that doesn't help, well then your probably shouldn't help them.

Anyway, it is a great idea, assuming you have a decent comp. Also, if you would be so kind, if you do do it, join team 33258. This is my Motherboards.org team. We want/need your help, maybe. It would be a good thing. Remember team 33258!

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Sleep is important

Let me explain. I had a class this morning at 8 AM after that class I came back to my apartment to get ready for my next class. Next thing I know I am in bed and it is three in the afternoon.

Before this, that is the night before, as you can probably tell I was up until after 3:20. Anyway, I had woken up at about 8 AM that morning. Then that night, or better put this morning, I didn't get to sleep until about 2 AM. Unfortunately for me I had an 8AM class. I woke up a little before 7 and went to class sometime later. Then the rest of the story.

In conclusion, get your sleep.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

OMFG FFVII ADVENT CHILDREN IS GREAT

Thanks to some helpful info from a friend, I was able to see it.

This has to be the best CG Movie ever.

I won't give anything away, because I am not one of those people.

However, I must say the look of everything was one step above and beyond.

I have to compliment everyone who worked on it.

I also have to compliment the people who gave it to us, regardless of the legalities.

Really, though I give it a 100 out of 10, that is how goes it was, I do not exeggerate.

Great Action and Suspense. Wonderful Music and Cinematics. Most importantly a Superb Plot.

The hype was 100% Correct. This movie is as great as everyone thought it would be.

I love it, hell if I didn't I wouldn't be up at 3:20 in the morning writing a blog entry. I need sleep for goodness sake. My first class is at 11 so I need to be up by 9ish.

Again, just WOW!!

They couldn't have a done a better job on this.

I am so awe struck.

I just don't know what else to say.

I think I should go to sleep before I pass out at the keyboard.

Monday, September 12, 2005

Micrsoft Plus isn't that bad

I recently installed a "newly aquired" copy of Microsoft Plus and found a great Screensaver. It takes pictures and makes a little slideshow with Media Player playlists playing in the background.

Anyway, I was just saying this because watching 50+ pictures of Catherine Bell cross your screen makes me happy. Also the music in the background is a mixture of 30+ E-Rotic songs. So the idea is firmly there, if you understand my language.

Anyway, just thought I would share my new "joy" with you, you losers.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

BTW, still seeking help....

This will be my last post about this subject, probably until next year...

I would greatly appreciate help from anyone who 1) understand what this blog is about and 2) wants to post whatever they want, within reason. That will be discussed later.

Anyway, where it stands right now, I have one possible taker. I would like to have something solid within the end of the next week. So please email and/or IM me. My info is all on the side bar.

Thanks
=The Management=

Galactica

Now did anyone see yesterday's ep? I mean seriously what is their plan? I am so confused. I certainly wasn't expecting that at all. It seems that everything was perfectly planned out. Which of course begs the question, who among them is also a cylon? The boomer they have said 8 are in the fleet and of course now there are, I guess, seven less to find, unless the other 3 they found much earlier are included. I dunno.

Also, less importantly, this whole hurricane situation is getting out of hand now. Look like I said earlier, there was nothing no one could have done, now that is, however in hind sight, the levy's could've been upgraded among other things.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Also....

OpenSuSE 10.0 RC1 was released today...


Most of you won't care and that is all well and good, but I thought you should know. I will hopefully have it up and running by the weekend, currently having PC problems.

UTTyler Webcam

See, I don't lie, another update:

The link in the title should take you to the school's construction webcam.
If it ever loads you will see the progress they have made

This is what I have accomplished in my first four sessions of 2325

Well okay so you can call me pathetic or just plain bored, but I don't care. I honestly have nothing better to do.
Well on the first day I show just how bored I was with paint:

I then thought well wouldn't it be funny if I threw something together with the whole Harry Carey theme from last year so I did.
I started out with this picture of Harry Carey:

Funny, HUH?
Anyway, I then made this little picture, but unfortunately couldn't find a picture of Whitson to put in it. (If you have a pic email me please):

I then thought how could I continue to be funny and humorous? I know I'll make a spoofed University ID Card and thanks to 1 minute in paint here it is:

Now this is funny.

Anyway, I am gonna find something else to do, will probably update again before end of class.

Friday, September 02, 2005

We're all boobs

I mean that literally and figuratively.

That is, we all have them, male or female, thin or fat. Sometimes you just can't see them.

However, more importantly, we all seem to live in a bubble. Sheltered. Kept away from the truth that sorrounds us. No I am not talking about religion, what do you think I am stupid? Instead I refer to the current situation w/ the hurricane, that is its aftermath.

IMHO, regardless of how much forewarning and preparedness we could have had, we would not be any better off. There still would be people that would not have evacuted. The levees would probably have still failed. Nothing would be happening any faster or more effeciently.

Why, you ask? I'll tell you.

People are inherently and by their very nature, STUPID!!!!
We have come to rely too much on the things we make for ourselves and don't realize how much we need them until they are gone. Then we instantly expect a quick fix, as though somehow everything is prepared for, which is such a horrible way to think. Humans are the most ill prepared people at everything that most other "animals" can do without any real issues.

Also, why do all the media outlets seem to be looking for a scapegoat? This is no one's fault. No one could have accounted for this happening. This is by far the stupidest thing the media could be doing right now. Also all people are doing right now is complain. Well guess what, It won't accomplish one god damned thing.

That's it, I've given my little speil.

Carpe Nocturn

You know, usually when someone says Carpe Nocturn, which I do think means Seize the Night, it makes one think great things. Instead I install programs on my PC, watch Law and Order SVU, order pizza, watch more tv, and fold clothes. I dunno, you know? I've lost my edge.

Anyway, have a great weekend everyone, I know I won't.

I don't have a clue

I'm so very tired. It's almost all the time now.